Poetry is an unparalleled form of communication.
You may say, ‘It’s a nice day today.’ Or you may
say,
‘Today, the sky smiled at me, and my heart escaped
into the sun’s warm embrace.’
Both sentences describe the day; but the second is
more memorable.
I’ve always been fascinated by the musicality of
words. Music in itself, is my happy place. I listen to rap, love songs from the
eighties and gospel music, while I’m in the bathroom. And I often follow
leading poets and speakers on YouTube. I’m restless, when it comes to immersing
myself in poetry. I take risks when it comes to speaking and creating. From
working on radio, where I felt at home, from 6:00am to 10:00am every weekday, I
woke up Kampala City.
The term, ‘Morning Person,’ suited me, and I have
since then relished waking up from 3am to 5am, starting the day with verve and
prayer. There are countless reasons I could complain; aren’t there always.
Truthfully though, the lockdown has placed my mind into a space where I am only
able to receive abundance. Starting with videos posted on my growing YouTube
channel (35 subscribers, as of 15 August 2020), then growing clientele for my
public speaking training sessions, and above all, a heightened sense of
purpose. By purpose, I don’t mean that short-lived superficial fuzzy feeling
when you’re walking in a daze. I mean the grounded and consistent meaningful
purpose, which despite what life may throw, I keep going. I could never have
learned this on my own. Gratitude goes to individual advisors; those living
across the ocean, and those nearby. There are a handful, but the calls,
messages, and emails, are a constant motivation and blessing.
I pray too; not as often as I used to, because I
want to do more receiving of the things I’ve been praying for, over the
decades. I do pray, though and read the bible, at least three times a week.
Listening to audio-visual sermons are important, too.
The lockdown has been my ultimate happy place, over
the past few months. Saying that with the knowledge of the devastation it has
caused businesses, I’d be frugal not to share how I’ve been blessed. I don’t
mean the kind of blessing that undermines others’ challenges, or undermines
others’ struggles and honest hard work. I mean the blessing that keeps on
appearing, as a reminder that God is actually in my life.
It’s been a life of hills and valleys, the past 44
years; but during the lockdown, I had to kick the consistent roller-coaster of
highs and endless lows, in the groin. I had had enough. Just as one challenge
was closed, another fifteen would reappear, and some so subtle, like a dormant
volcano, erupting in the most unusual of places, disrupting my short-lived
bliss.
I’ve been blessed towards a sharp sense of
realization. I had been missing it all along. There have been warning signs
blaring red; for so long, but can’t be ignored.
Amongst them are:-
I need to follow my gut; always. This could be the
prompting of the Holy Spirit, God’s leading, but ALWAYS. Whenever I haven’t,
it’s been disastrous.
God, first thing when I wake up; no matter the deadlines.
Small things like someone arriving late for a
meeting continuously; I should never ever work with them, since they have no
respect for time, or work ethic.
If someone constantly talks about themselves and
never acknowledges my own story, or voice, that is a clear sign that they have
no interest in me.
If someone shares my ideas on social media; with no
explanation from where it originated, it reflects a level of narcissism and
lack of originality that should be avoided like a plague.
If someone keeps complaining about others; both
online and offline, then they’ll complain, whine and gossip about me too.
If someone uses friendship or sisterhood, to get
out of payment for my professional services, then that sisterhood may as well
turn into nothinghood.
If someone uses Christianity to perpetuate misogyny
and sexual abuse, then I need to flee, and warn all the people within a 1,000
mile radius.
Don’t chase people. Don’t put
them on a pedestal Challenge them. If you place someone on a pedestal and show
them you’re in constant awe, they will hardly respect you and only see you as a
fan.
These are just a few.
Being in lockdown has given me significant time to
reflect, and introspection is something I never shy from. I have diaries full
of my thoughts and lessons learned, in quiet moments.
The spread in The Full Monitor, Saturday 15 August
2020, is part of the story, and part of the promise from God. He and I spent
copious amounts of time talking, or maybe I did more of the talking. He knows I
need this, and more. I know it’s time for change. I’m enjoying the process.
